The Gift of Driving Again
It still catches me by surprise sometimes—I’m driving again.
After years without my license, it's hard to believe that I’ve had it back for
around two years now. Each time I take the wheel, I feel that deep sense of
appreciation. Driving is more than transportation for me—it’s independence,
opportunity, and a fresh breath of life.
I’ve been blessed to drive a 2010 Subaru Forester. It wasn’t
brand-new, but it was mine, and I was grateful. I took care of it the best I
could, handling some of the expected upkeep and even a few unexpected issues
over the past couple of summers. It got me where I needed to go, and for a
while, that was enough.
But over time, things started to shift.
This past season, I noticed a few concerning things. Three
warning lights appeared on my dash, and the acceleration started acting
strange—revving and struggling in ways I didn’t provoke. Then came the big one:
I turned the ignition off, and the car wouldn’t turn back on. Between that and
a few unsettling noises, I began to feel uneasy.
I had already been spending money on repairs, maintenance,
and some unrelated expenses. But I couldn’t shake the feeling—what if something
else failed soon? Was I going to end up stranded somewhere? I started wondering
if it was time to stop pouring money into an aging vehicle and consider
something newer, safer, and more reliable.
The Weight of a Big Decision
The idea of buying a different vehicle came with its own set
of anxieties. I haven’t had a car payment in many years, and my income is based
on disability and part-time work. Taking on a monthly bill felt heavy. But I
also had to weigh that against the peace of mind that could come from a more
dependable vehicle. After praying about it, I began to consider upgrading.
It was not a decision I took lightly. I know what it’s like
to go without. I know what it’s like to make do. But I also know what it’s like
to trust God with the unknown—and this was one of those moments.
Setting Criteria and Starting the Search
I set some boundaries to help guide my search:
- A
model year between 2015 and 2020
- Less
than 100,000 miles
- Within
a price range I could responsibly manage
- Large
enough to handle my walker and mobility needs—so likely an SUV
I started browsing online listings at local dealerships.
Hours passed as I sifted through options, making mental notes and weighing pros
and cons. I was cautiously optimistic but determined to find the right fit.
The One That Got Away
Then a certain vehicle caught my eye. It looked like a
perfect match—it checked all my boxes. I called the dealership, hopeful and
maybe a little excited. The salesman answered and informed me, “Ma’am, that
vehicle sold 30 minutes ago.”
I was disappointed. I’m sure he could hear it in my voice.
After all those hours of searching and starting to get hopeful, it felt like
the rug had been pulled out.
But God Was Already Ahead of Me
Before I started this journey, I had prayed—specifically. I
asked the Lord to guide my steps, to shut doors that needed shutting, and to
provide the right vehicle for me, not just any vehicle. Others had been
praying with me, too. I didn’t want to settle for something outside of God's
best just because I was anxious to make a move.
The salesman continued, “We do have more vehicles on the
lot.” He mentioned one that met all the criteria I had prayed about. I agreed
to come by the next afternoon and take a look.
And truly—you will not convince me that God didn’t
orchestrate the whole affair. I called about a vehicle that was already gone,
and ended up having a conversation about one I never even looked at once I was
at the dealership. But once I arrived, it was clear: God had given me the right
place, the right salesman, and the right vehicle.
And I couldn’t help but think back to something that had
happened just a few weeks earlier. My Subaru had been in the shop for repairs,
and I hadn’t driven it beforehand because I didn’t feel it was safe. So I
borrowed my mom’s large SUV to run a couple of errands. Afterward, she asked me
how I felt about driving it, and I told her—it felt good. It didn’t make me
anxious at all.
That moment stuck with me. Looking back now, I believe the
Lord allowed me to drive her vehicle again as a gentle reminder: I could
handle something different. I could adapt. Two years ago, when I first
got my license back, I had driven her SUV a few times before getting the Subaru
and it intimidated me then. Maybe I needed to be reminded that a bigger vehicle
was not only manageable—but even comfortable.
Arriving at the Dealership
When I pulled into the dealership, I had more than just
specs and numbers on my mind. I was thinking about past conversations, the
opinions and wisdom of others, and most of all, how I was feeling in that very
moment. I didn’t want to rush into anything out of desperation. I also didn’t
want to back myself into a corner financially—buying something that didn’t feel
quite right, when maybe something slightly newer and more enjoyable might have
been possible with a similar payment.
I shared all this with the salesman, trying to be as honest
and clear as I could. I even opened up a little more and told him that this
whole process was new for me. I had never made such a purchase on my own
before—not without my husband. I felt the weight of that as I navigated this
major decision. It was a new chapter, and it came with uncertainty, and even
some grief.
He listened kindly, then said, “Let me go speak to someone.
I have an idea.”
A few minutes later, he came back and said, “What if I told
you I could have you in a brand-new Ford Bronco Sport, and keep you within the
same financial range you’ve been talking about?”
I was surprised.
I hadn’t even considered a new vehicle—not at all. But
something in me paused, and I realized: the Lord knows exactly what we need.
The Test Drive and a Clear Path Forward
So, we continued talking—and then test driving. I was paying
attention to everything: how it handled, how I felt in the seat, how easily I
could see around me and get in and out with my walker. And honestly? It felt
right.
To my amazement, all of the financial pieces came together
smoothly. There were no snags, no hard haggles, no confusing roadblocks.
Everything just… worked out.
And for that, I will be forever grateful.
Driving Off the Lot
I’ll admit—I was a bit nervous when I finally sat in the
driver’s seat and buckled my seatbelt to drive off the lot. This was really
happening. I took a deep breath, adjusted all of my mirrors, and eased out onto
the road, thankful and happy with the outcome.
By the time I pulled into the driveway, I was still smiling.
My mom knew I had originally gone to look at a 2019 white Toyota Highlander,
and when I stepped out of my new green Ford Bronco Sport, she looked at me,
smirked, and teased, “Well… that’s no white Toyota.”
Looking Back—and Forward
Since that day, I’ve felt nothing but peace about the
decision. Yes, it was a big step. Yes, it involved finances, trust, and letting
go of old routines. But what I gained is more than a new vehicle—it’s a
reminder that God truly does go before us.
He hears our prayers.
He sees the parts we can’t see.
And He provides what we need, when we need it.
I’m still adjusting to this new season—this new
independence, this new car, and the ongoing journey of doing life differently
than I once did. But I’m not alone. I never have been.
A Word of Encouragement
If you’re facing a big decision and feeling unsure, I want
to encourage you—don’t rush. Don’t settle. Pray. Wait. Watch. The same
God who guided me to the right vehicle in His timing can guide you in whatever
you’re facing.
“And thine ears shall hear a word behind thee, saying,
This is the way, walk ye in it...” Isaiah 30:21
He is faithful. He is personal. And He cares about even the
practical parts of our lives—yes, even car shopping.
God’s Hand Was in it All
When I think back on the whole journey—driving again after
so long, dealing with the old Subaru, praying through every option—I just have
to stop and thank God. He really was with me through every single part of it.
Even the things that felt frustrating at the time—like
unexpected repairs or a vehicle that just wouldn’t cooperate—turned out to be
part of the path He was clearing. His provision didn’t always come all at once,
but it always came on time.
“But my God shall supply all your need according to his
riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:19
I saw it in little ways and big ones. Like when He gave me
peace to wait instead of rushing. Like when He helped me ask the right
questions, or put the right person in my path. He didn’t just meet my need—He
went beyond it. He took care of things I hadn’t even thought to pray about.
Stand Still and Be Amazed
You know, sometimes we forget just how awesome God really
is. Not just kind. Not just capable. He’s full of glory. The kind that makes
you stop in your tracks and say, “Wow… that was You, Lord.”
“O LORD our Lord, how excellent is thy name in all the
earth! who hast set thy glory above the heavens.” Psalm 8:1
I didn’t just end up with a car. I ended up with a story—a
reminder that God sees, God cares, and God still moves mountains in our lives.
And I want to encourage you: if you’re in a season of waiting, or things just
don’t make sense right now, hold on. Keep praying. He’s working in the
background.
God’s timing is perfect. His provision is sure. And His
love is so much bigger than we understand. I’m still in awe of Him. And I
hope you are too.
