What Next - life unknowns

After nearly a decade of teaching, the decision to close my homeschool was not an easy one. Reflecting on that season of my life, I see God’s hand guiding me through each step. From completing my degree against all odds to running a homeschool from my mom’s basement, each phase seemed arranged to meet my needs and prepare me for what was to come. Even in the unknowns I face now, I trust He is still leading me forward.

“The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way.” Psalm 37:23

A Decade of Purposeful Teaching

In 2010, after my recovery journey brought me home from Georgia, I returned to college to finish my degree, through East Carolina's online degree completion program that I had begun before the wreck. Before my accident, I had only completed about half of the requirements, so with much still left, the challenge felt overwhelming. Yet God provided a way. Through vocational rehabilitation, my remaining tuition costs were covered, and I only had to pay for textbooks. This unexpected blessing allowed me to focus on completing my degree and preparing for the future. I believe this was part of God’s plan, knowing that the skills I would acquire and the income supplement would be helpful later on. I completed student teaching at my local elementary school, which opened the door to operating my own homeschool program for ten years.

Teaching from home was more than just a job—it was a perfect fit for my unique circumstances at the time. Being close to home meant I didn’t have to rely on transportation, a major hurdle back then, and I could work within my physical limitations. It was also a season that allowed me to continue recovering, building both my teaching skills and physical strength in a familiar environment. It became a time to grow and move forward with God’s provision, right where I was.

Reflections on Teaching: Memorable Classroom Moments

Pottery Creating Field Trip

Some of my favorite teaching memories come from the unique ways we celebrated learning together. Each morning, we’d open our school day with prayer, taking prayer requests and sharing a brief devotional to start us off on the right foot. One devotional about Jesus as the Good Shepherd had a lasting impact. Later that day, one of my students shared this story with her mom, who was touched. She realized that while her daughter might not experience everything that traditional schooling offered, she was gaining something far more meaningful—faith and spiritual growth.

Spirit Week's "Asylum Warden" and Her Gang

Our Spirit Weeks were also a highlight. Each day had a theme, and my students and I would dress accordingly, capturing the fun with a group photo. Every spring, we commemorated the year with a Field Day and a day to tie-dye T-shirts. The students loved these traditions, and so did I. Several field trips throughout the year took us to places like apple orchards and local attractions, where we made memories that we’d cherish for years to come.

Field Day Shenanigans 

God’s Leading to Close This Chapter

In March 2024, I sent a letter to each of my nine students, letting them know I planned to teach one more year before closing the school. Little did I know, God had other plans. During spring break, a family with three of my students requested a meeting. I had been praying for direction, asking for confirmation from the Lord, and on that Monday, I received an answer. The family shared that, with one of their children starting kindergarten in the fall, they had decided to teach their children at home as well. I completely understood this; it made sense to avoid any confusion for their kindergartener adjusting to formal schooling.

“And thine ears shall hear a word behind thee, saying, This is the way, walk ye in it, when ye turn to the right hand, and when ye turn to the left.” Isaiah 30:21

For me, this family’s decision felt like the confirmation I needed from God to end my teaching in May 2024 rather than May 2025. This would leave me with only two in-person students, both with a six-year age gap and of opposite genders—a combination that didn’t feel appropriate or beneficial for anyone. With a sense of peace, I notified the rest of my families that the school would be closing sooner than planned. Although this decision was difficult after ten years, I trusted that God was guiding me forward.

Embracing the Unknown with Faith

Letting go of teaching was a bittersweet choice. I loved the daily joys of teaching—watching my students grow, hearing their questions, and sharing in their accomplishments. Yet, with my newfound freedom of obtaining a driver’s license, I felt it was time to step beyond the basement and out into the world. This freedom symbolized a new season of growth and independence. I knew God was calling me to move forward, to step out in faith, and to explore new opportunities.

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.” Jeremiah 29:11

Now, as I close this chapter, I don’t yet have a clear plan. Every day, I feel a bit more of the uncertainty that comes with waiting on God’s next step. To ease that sense of anxiousness, I am focusing on learning new skills, particularly in technology, which I believe could be useful as I look toward the future. I am not idle, and I am certainly not giving up. Instead, I am using this time to refine my skills, work on my blog, and offer motivational talks. In these talks, I share my testimony of God’s grace and faithfulness throughout all the trials I have endured. The thing about a personal testimony—it’s just that. No one can refute it and convince you otherwise because it has been your experience.

“Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord.” Psalm 27:14

Seeking Guidance Through Vocational Rehabilitation

Recently, I reached out to a vocational rehabilitation job counselor, hoping to explore options I may not have previously considered. This counselor is helping me evaluate possibilities for my next steps and what I might be able to pursue in this new season. I am praying that God will reveal His will for me through these new resources and opportunities.

I know I am not alone in feeling unsettled about an uncertain future, but I also know that God is with me. He has carried me through so much already, and I believe He will continue to guide me. Even when the way ahead seems unclear, I am reminded of His promise to provide and direct.

“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6

New Skills and Personal Growth

Since stepping away from teaching, I’ve been working on new skills that have opened up paths I hadn’t considered before. In many ways, it’s been like cultivating a garden, adding to my "box of goodies" with things like coding (HTML, etc.) and automation exploration. I’ve also been honing my writing, especially through this blog—a skill I hadn’t really used since college.

Sharing My Testimony at a Ladies' Bible Study

Public speaking has been another area of focus, with an emphasis on enunciation and projection, which has been a great challenge and growth experience. Each new skill is another tool that I can use to share my journey and connect with others, and I’m thankful for the opportunity to learn and grow.

Honest Frustrations in the Waiting Season

At times, I want to yell out in frustration that I need a plan—that I need to know what to do. I sometimes feel like I'm floundering, not advancing, not moving forward in any way. It’s as if I’m just drifting in some unknown space, uncertain of what comes next.

“Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.” Psalm 55:22

Maybe you feel the same way, like life is pushing you forward without a clear path. I just want to get these thoughts out of myself. Perhaps as I let them go, they’ll start to make sense, and something will come of them. I believe God hears every cry and knows every worry, and that one day, clarity will come.

I've questioned my decision, wondering if I made the right choice. I've questioned what I'm doing; at times, it feels like nothing. But if I believe there’s a purpose in everything and that there are no coincidences—something I hold dear—then I have to believe this is a time to shape myself and my skills for what lies ahead.

Lately, I've been realizing the importance of opening up, not only for my own healing but for those who might feel the same struggles in silence. Truthfully, seeing other couples or families sometimes brings a twinge of envy. I deeply loved being a wife, and there’s a sense of loss in that. But in those moments, I remind myself of God’s promises. He knows my heart and the future, even when it’s not visible to me. I keep coming back to the words in Joshua 1, where God calls us to be strong and courageous, not afraid or dismayed. I hold onto that truth when I pray, asking God to help me find contentment and satisfaction in what I have right now. Because we’re told to seek Him first, and He promises to provide for us.

It’s so easy to fall into the trap of comparison, yet we’re reminded in 1 Corinthians not to compare ourselves with others because it’s not wise. That’s a hard truth to grasp, but ultimately, it frees us to compare ourselves to Christ alone. He’s our true example, the One we should strive to mirror in words, actions, and love – not looking around at others but fixing our gaze on Him.

I once thought I had my life mapped out – a high school diploma, marriage, a home, a steady job. It all seemed secure, and then suddenly, it was gone. That left me questioning where to go from here. A dear friend helped me see this differently: to view this chapter as a precious chance for a do-over, something few people ever get. A blank canvas, a fresh start. Now, I’m slowly learning to see it as an opportunity to rewrite my story with faith and a heart open to wherever God leads me.

Stepping Forward in Faith

In this season of waiting, I am learning to embrace each small, faithful step. Each new skill I learn, each story I share, brings me closer to whatever God has planned. Although I sometimes feel anxious about the future, I take comfort in knowing that God has already mapped out the path ahead of me. Through this transition, I hope to encourage others to trust in God’s timing and to find peace, even in the midst of life’s unknowns.

“But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31

Dear Lord, help me to want what You want for me, whatever that might be. You know my heart and my desires, but I trust that You know what’s best. Guide my steps, even when I feel uncertain, and fill me with the courage to follow wherever You lead. Thank You for Your grace You’ve shown me, and may my journey inspire others to lean into Your promises, finding peace in Your perfect plan. Amen.

Thank you for joining me on this journey. I am grateful for each of you, and I pray that by sharing my story, you may find encouragement in your own transitions. Remember, God’s plans are always for our good, even when we don’t fully understand them. Hold onto His promises, take small steps, and trust that He is guiding you every step of the way.

Share your heart with me.

Be encouraged. 🧡